Tell me Three Things
August 11, 2020
To be honest, there’s a lot to criticize about this book. But, I’d
be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy it, even if it was a tiny part of
me that really liked the (predictable!) meet-cute trope.
Now to the criticism!
1. California Stereotypes: This book felt like it was written by
someone who’s clearly put little to no time researching life in
California. No, Californian girls are not all “white, blonde, thin,
and half-naked.” There’s actually a high Asian and Hispanic
population.
2. Hypocrisy about Feminism: For a so-called ‘feminist’ Jessie sure
does stereotype other girls a lot. Uses the b-word constantly to
describe other girls and constantly implies she’s somehow better
than the other “vacant-eyed Barbie and Ken Dolls.” Honestly, the
next quote is just weird:
“I quickly snap a selfie of me alone on a bench with my half-eaten
peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I smile instead of pout, though,
and label with the hashtag #Day14. Those blondes would pout, turn it
into an I’m so sexy picture, and then Instagram it. “Look how hot I
am not eating my sandwich!””
I mean, wtf? Get off your high horse, Jessie, it’s not that big of a
deal.
3. Multiple attractive boys falling for average narrator for no
apparent reason trope: Do I need to say any more??
4. Unrealistic Text Messages with SN: First of all: the name
Somebody Nobody. He really couldn’t pick a cooler sounding
pseudonym? It’s not hard—there’s Count Von Count, Cookie Monster,
Mr. Snuffleupagus, and many more.
Also, some of the conversations didn’t sound real. As a special
snowflake put it, “I’ve heard robots that sound more human than
those two texting.” And the texts just try too hard to be modern and
relatable and use slang—to the point where it’s annoying to some
readers.
Something the book did sort of well was that the identity of SN
wasn’t completely obvious. The author had me guessing between Ethan,
Liam, Caleb, (and maybe Theo? But not really). I always rooted for
Ethan but never knew for sure.
I will say that I’m glad it was.